fudge

Monday, 7 November 2011

We Are Learning To Make Fire - WoW

Write On Wednesdays


NaBloPoMo Day 7

Every week I join in with a writing group over at Ink Paper Pen. (please check it out, it's great!)

Each week we are given a writing prompt by Gill and the idea is to set your timer for 5 minutes and write the first word that come into your head (you can go back and edit:).

I have an ongoing story about a character called Rock Chick(check my sidebar if you want to know more)

This weeks writing prompt is:

Write On Wednesdays Exercise 23 - Write the words of Margaret Atwood at the top of your page "We are learning to make fire". Set your timer to 5 minutes. Write the first words that come into your head after the prompt. Stop when the buzzer rings.

I wasn't familiar with this poem so I read it and decided to use the line 'I watch you, watching me'   as my inspiration this week.

This is a direct follow on from last weeks story.

The Pull of the Moon

Making her way across the crowded room she could feel his eyes watching her every move.

She drew strength from his unwavering gaze as the memories wrapped tendrils around her heart. Tugging her back just as surely as the moon controls the tides.

Sliding a hand around her waist he pulling her towards him kissing the high curve of her cheekbone.

His other hand slipped behind her neck, pulling her closer still.

Breathing in her scent.

His fingertips touched her face where his lips had been. Slowly tracing the line of her jaw.  His thumb grazing her mouth.

"You touch my soul" he whispered..

Reflected in the mirror above the bar she could see the golden orb of the moon hanging low in the sky.

Calmly watching ...  Patiently waiting  ...

15 comments:

The Musings Of A Small One said...

You have such an amazing way with the metaphors you use! I absolutely love your phrase, "the memories wrapped tendrils around her heart". Beautiful writing as always. Zx

helloitsgemma said...

wow! that's beautifully written and in 5 minutes - what a great idea.
Love the name of your blog too XX
hope you are enjoying NaBloPoMo

Fiona @nlpmum said...

Ahhh - I fancy a bit of that kind of passion ;-0 Lovely writing F

Lillie McFerrin said...

This is wonderful! I especially like the way you ended it. So many possibilities.

Romina Garcia said...

Love it. I want to know what happens next!!

TV said...

Love how the characters movements seem so natural. There are a lot of stories where the description of people's movements are a bit bizarre or hard to understand.
Fantastic :)

B said...

Nice job! Very sensual... Oohh lah lah!

I was just wondering, this is a question for all of the WoW crew... Do you go back and edit your piece before hitting 'Publish'? I tend to go back through and fix up punctuation, tense and spelling... does anyone else do this?

Madmother said...

Great writing, but must admit to confusion (could be due to the lack of sleep)... was the phrase or prompt not set, or could we use another?

As to the previous commenter. No, I usually leave my typos/spelling mistakes in this sort of thing.

Stephanie said...

Ah, pure bliss! I love it! The emotion, the imagery, and the flow of the piece is great. I love how you incorporated the movements of their bodies in your piece. Great job!

Sarah Mac said...

Thank you Z :)

Thanks Gemma - My blog name came from someone saying that to me and it just felt like the right name for it. Loving NaBloPoMo so far - hope you are too!

Thanks Fiona :)

Thanks Lillie - as it's an ongoing story it's nice to leave a question mark at the end :)

And you shall Romina ;) more next week!

Thanks TV - I'm glad it worked :)

Thanks B and yes, I go back and edit quite a lot sometimes but only typos, grammar ect - the basis stays the same.

Ah MM - the prompt was the title of the poem but Gill is usually quite open to us using our own take on it and I'm a terrible rule breaker so I chose to use a line from the poem for mine. I did think about using the actual title but 'I watch you watching me' seemed to fit better.

Thank you Stephanie :)

Jayne said...

Ooooh this gives me chills. VERY sexy indeed. LOVE it, especially the references to the moon x

Sif said...

This had a dangerous sense of foreboding for me. He seemed very intense and she seemed calm and as if she had some sort of foreknowledge - or maybe I was reading too much into it?

Rain said...

Sarah, great turn of events. The bloke seems up to no good, but only because I read the previous issue of Rock chick; on this piece he is as innocent as anything. I can't wait to see what tricks you've got up your sleeve. ;) "Calmly watching... Patiently waiting..." is a perfect way to end this piece and leave us full of suspense and curiosity, but it's quite certainly a terrible way to describe the way I'm watching and waiting for the next installment of Rock chick!

B, I go back and edit every single time. I rarely edit the content of my piece, but I do change words and phrases for others which hadn't come to mind at the time of writing but seem better than the ones which had.

/ Rain

InkPaperPen said...

Loving the memories wrapping tendrils around the heart. Great description.

Lot of passion in this piece, a sensual read and one of my favorites from you!

Yes, as you say, Sarah, I am fine with changing the prompt to suit your writing needs. Whatever works for you.

In response to B's question, I often edit my piece a little, depending upon how much time I have up my sleeve but I think it is better to do as MM says, just press publish after the timer rings! But, I am not always brave enough to do so...The whole point of the 5 min exercise is to publish the piece how it is first written but then again, do what works best for you.

x

Sarah Mac said...

Thanks Jayne - there's an awful lot of passion floating around here ;)

There is a huge amount of intensity Sif and it is coming from him.

There is almost a sense of inevitablility in her detatchment and maybe a little foreboding too. there could be a storm on the way.

Thank you Rain - there may be a little more suspense to come yet :)

Thank you Gill :) I struggle with leaving they typos ect (although one or two may slip through)